Finding Purpose in Hospice Care: My 45 Years as a Volunteer

My journey with hospice began in 1980, long before most people were comfortable talking about death and dying. In the late 1970s, my father-in-law died in a Boston hospital. The experience, to put it lightly, was not ideal. He went through his final days in isolation, and without the comforting care so many of us associate with hospice today. I felt there must be another way. 

I started reading about the hospice philosophy as it was emerging, and I remember looking through the Yellow Pages and asking, "Do we have a hospice?" Fortunately, Hospice of the North Shore (now Care Dimensions) had just been founded in 1978. I joined the second ever volunteer training class in 1980, when there was just a volunteer coordinator and a handful of dedicated volunteers visiting patients at home. 

Serving Several Roles 

I was scared in the beginning. I wondered, "Who am I to be helpful?" But over the years, I've served in a variety of roles: visiting patients at home, working at the Kaplan House front desk since it opened in 2005, offering Reiki therapy, making cover-ups for patients, and creating comfort squares and cairns (small rock stacks which you might associate with a beach or hiking trail, which we build as smaller keepsakes to represent calm and peace). In addition to my 45 years as a volunteer, I also worked for the organization for 20 of those years, in office support and development roles. This has truly become my mission in life. 

I've always done volunteer work with different organizations, but hospice is different. It's so personal. When you have a calling to do something this profound and humbling - to be there for patients and their families during the hardest moments of their lives - you answer it. 

Supporting Families Through Difficult Transitions 

At the Kaplan House reception desk, we're often the first faces families see when they arrive. People are coming in to do probably the hardest thing in their life, bringing their loved one here knowing they're likely going to die here. We have to bring our sense of compassion and hospitality to these people. It's a vital role. 

What keeps me coming back year after year? It's so rewarding to just be there and be present for people, for what they're going through. And it's not just doom and gloom. It's people sharing their lives and who they are. What a gift that they can trust you and allow you to be present with them at the hardest time in their life. 

Families are so grateful to be here. I can't tell you the number of families who promised their loved one they would keep them at home, but towards the end, they simply couldn't. It was too much. They're relieved to be here where they can just be present with their loved one and know that a whole team of people is here to support them. 

At Kaplan Since the Start 

I remember when the Kaplan House was just a dream. In 2004, we gathered to bless the land. The chaplain led us in a big circle where we prayed and sang. It was just a joyous event.  

I think about how far we've come since those early days when you couldn't even mention hospice or death and dying to anybody; it was like seeing a curtain come down over their face. Now we've cared for thousands of people, and most understand what hospice is, though we still need to educate people that it's better for families and patients to come on earlier rather than later because we care for the whole family. 

Every time I come through that front door, I feel that sense of dignity and peace here. When I bring family members down before their loved one arrives, I stress that we're here for everybody, the whole family. 

So Many Opportunities to Help 

To anyone considering volunteering, I would say reach out to the volunteer coordinator and take the training. Not everybody can work directly with families and patients, but there are so many other opportunities to help the organization. We have an incredible volunteer who knits about 35 comfort squares a week and has been doing so for about 7 years. That adds up to many thousands! There are lots of ways to help because we're all part of a team. 

After 45 years, I feel humbled and honored to be part of this organization. I could cry just thinking about it. I feel so blessed to be part of Care Dimensions and the Kaplan House.

Learn more about volunteer opportunities at CareDimensions.org/Volunteers.